I have not stopped thinking about John lately. I don't know what it is but it just keeps getting harder and harder to get over him. I can't pretend he wasn't part of my life in a major way but I wish I could at least not think about his 23/7.
Does he think of me?
Is he happy with his new girlfriend?
How's his liver?
Does he take his meds anymore?
Does he even need his meds anymore?
What are his doctors saying?
Did he keep any of the things I gave him?
How's he holding up?
Am I the only one struggling to move on?
There are so many questions running through my mind and it is so hard to answer them. I feel like a lot of the relationship was a lie on his part so I don't feel like I can answer those questions.
Everyone always said it would only get easier every day and it hasn't. It's gotten worse.
A couple new changes: My tattoo has healed and I love it! (I'll have to put a picture of the final/ healed . I got my ear's pierced (I am shocked that I did this... I'll have to post pictures of all of this stuff) and my new glasses which no one has seen yet (at least no one that reads this blog).
Well I will be in and out until I really move on and get better. Hopefully people are right and it does get easier ... maybe it wont be by day... maybe by months but I'll keep ya'll posted.
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