John's gone. Went back home early Saturday. I haven't cried except maybe 1 or 5 tears last night when we got off the phone.
I hate the fact that everywhere I go (since I used to go everywhere with John) everyone asks me where John is. I have to tell them that he went home and isn't here for the next 3.5 months. Everytime I say this I get all choked up like I want to cry obviously I cant.
John hates crying (that's what I keep telling myself so I don't cry, I wouldn't want to disappoint him). And it seems like I am writing this like I he has been gone forever and I have had to tell a ton of people about it even though he's only been gone since yesterday. Well, I had a family party yesterday and everyone kept asking and when I worked today, for those of my coworkers who knew I was dating him asked me and I just want to cry right in front of them (I know, I know, John hates crying).
Anyways I really hate talking about it but just in case I am absent I am probably sitting on my bed, alone, staring at a wall or the door and hoping John will walk through it at any time. Yeah, in my dreams, I know.
Anyways, Happy Mothers Day to All Mothers out there. Thanks for all you all do.
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I'm sending HUGS your way. It's a tough thing when they leave, but imagine how much harder it would be without cell phones and computers! I heard from a friend about Skype (it's free, try Googling it) and she said it's really easy and fun. Makes the time apart much easier!
ReplyDeleteKeep your chin up. :)